I was recently asked why I started blogging. More specifically, why I chose to blog about being a milspouse and all the “fun stuff” that comes along with it. Then I was told “that has been done to death” and “aren’t there enough blogs out there like that?” Well, here’s my answers/opinions to those questions:
If every single milspouse had a blog, that would be amazing. Why? Because each and every single milspouse has their own story to tell. Each story is unique. And each milspouse has the right to write (keeping in mind OPSEC of course).
I’m new to the milspouse blogging community, but what I’ve seen so far is that they lift each other up. They struggle together. Cry together. Laugh together. Grieve together. Give each other strength. I’m excited to write and share in this unique and endearing community.
And why did I decide to start blogging? I too, have a story to tell. We’re a PT (part-time) military family with a three year old daughter. I’ve spent the past two hours attempting to get her to sleep because she misses her Daddy. I miss her Daddy.
My husband is in the Army National Guard, and typically juggles his full time job (law enforcement, lots of overtime) in addition to his commitments in the guard (drill station is a few hours away). However, as soon as those Title 10 orders are signed, we’re thrown into the full-time military world without the feeling of the full-time support.
PT MilSpouses have very few (if any) local resources, as we’re usually stuck in a civilian world that doesn’t understand us. In communities that don’t even know that they have MilSpouses. We don’t have the protection of a base, or the convenience of having a fellow MilSpouse close by. I don’t even know a single wife of any of the soldiers currently deployed with my husband, who is serving his second tour. Well, I know one – but her husband isn’t “with” my husband.
Please know that in no way, shape, or form am I discounting the full-time MilSpouses. I love you. I respect you. But, that’s not my life. That’s not the life of thousands of military spouses who live in the civilian world, and are thrown into the military world when a deployment comes crashing into their life.
The day those title 10 papers come in, we’re thrown into full-time military life. The day they’re back, we’re thrown into part-time military life with the additional pressures of full-time civilian world.
I reached out to a fellow PT MilFam, and told them of my new found calling to write to and for the PT Military community. This was the husband’s response (serves in Air National Guard):
“I couldn’t think of a single example I’ve seen or heard recommended for Guard/Reserve specific families. That is astonishing considering how unique the experience is for part-timers.”
Yes, our experiences are different. Our struggles are different. Our transitions are different. But our love and sacrifice during deployments is the same. I want to write and talk about the unique set of challenges that present us in this PT Military lifestyle, and make sure that you know you are not alone.
Even if no one reads my blog, it helps me to process the struggles of my own life. It helps to know that maybe, just maybe, my experiences can help someone going through what I’m going through.
I don’t know about you, but my husband is the person that I talk to the most. Well, he’s gone and communications with him are sporadic, unclear, and never guaranteed. I still need someone to listen. I still need someone to understand. I need to know I’m not alone. As August McLaughlin puts so perfectly, “I hope you’ll also take time to celebrate the freedom we have to put words on the page. Through our thoughts and stories, we can entertain, inspire, educate and change the world.”
So, I’m exercising my right to write by being a (PT) MilSpouse Blogger.
Good for you! Writing because we’re compelled to is the best reason, IMO.
Blogging has been profoundly helpful in my life and career, to my surprise. Wishing you the best with it!
Thank you! I look forward to pursuing this passion. My goal is to reach out and help other spouses in my position, so they know that they are not alone. My dream would be to see my book given out to PT military spouses at every Yellow Ribbon event before a deployment for free!
I hardly think of MilSpouse blogs as being “done to death,” but I’m new to MilSO blogging myself, so I’ve been looking for other blogs to follow and not finding a heck of a lot (at least, not on WordPress, and I’m not a Tumblr fan, though I do have an account). Like you said, even if no one’s reading, just writing on its own is therapeutic. Don’t let the naysayers get you down 🙂
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Bridget, I won’t! That same person also then realized how few resources there were for our specific segment of the military a service (“part-time” military) and he was then very supportive! Plus, the more I feel people say I can’t – I’m driven to prove them wrong. Please let me know if I can help you in any way! I love connecting with other milsos!
Thank you! Just connecting with others like yourself is lovely. We’re in something of a unique situation as well, as my husband is an Army dentist and when I tell people that they’re like, “They have dentists in the Army?” -_-
Also, my dad was in the Air Force reserves when I was growing up, and was also a full-time police officer, so I can kinda see where you’re coming from. 🙂 I remember *dreading* him having to leave for reserve duty, even though it was only for a few weeks! It always seemed like forever when I was so young.
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